A blogger that I read regularly, Wendy Melchior, posted today about her sons baseball game. She asked the following question: "Why is it hard to lose?" Below is my response. Not because I have the answer, but because I have a way that works for me.
"Why is it hard to lose?" Because you then become a Loser. Our society today doesn't tolerate losing or mediocrity. We have become a mean society and sports is the place much of this anger is displayed. Because it's acceptable to yell at sporting events. So you now get yelling, or coaching that is unacceptable because that person or coach doesn't want to feel like a loser. Some never learn that some days you will lose the game but that doesn't make you a loser. They think "I lose, therefore, I am a Loser." They didn't learn, as I did from a wise baseball man, that you win 60, you lose 60 and it's the other 42 that decide how good you are at baseball. Not at life. Your beloved Phillies won 92 games this year, and my beloved Jamie Moyer was credited with 16 of those wins. That means they are in the playoffs. That also means they lost 70 games. Do those 70 games matter to them now? I'd bet even the loss last night doesn't matter much to them, because they get to play tonight, and that is on their minds. That same wise baseball man also taught me that the most important thing in a baseball game is the next pitch. After it is thrown, it is ancient history. Good baseball players have short memories. Unfortunately most people do not. So you end up with a coaching staff coaching their team of 11 year-olds about winning and not about baseball. If you worry about playing baseball, the winning and losing will take care of itself. Kind of like life. If you take care of living as Christ-like as you can, life takes care of itself.
Steve in Central CA
P.S. I'll explain about Jamie Moyer another time.
I've been thinking about this after I responded. How do we end up where we are today? Isn't it as much our failures as our successes that mold us? Failure is underrated. Is it healthy if we grow up thinking everything we do is wonderful? Shouldn't we learn that some of what we do is average and some less than average? I can change your brake pads, but don't ask me about anything electrical in a car. That is why I go to an auto mechanic. He is above average in cars and trucks. I am average at best. That doesn't make me a bad person, just a bad mechanic.
Maybe No is the correct answer some times.
P.P.S. Jamie Moyer is a 45, almost 46, year old man still playing baseball. His fastball can't break a pane of glass, but he is successful. He is playing his 22nd year of major league baseball. He can teach us all things. His failure last night is a blip on his radar.
1 comment:
I think occasional losses in life are more important than always winning. Remember that quote I had in the pool bath room in high school, "you can learn more from a loss than you ever can from a win." My senior season was hard and I took it out on you and I shouldn't have. What I didn't realize then was that by going through what for me has hell at the time made the two years at COS that much better. If I didn't have that crappy season of water polo I would not have appreciated the two conference championships we won at COS as much as I did. And getting to be on a team with guys that went through similar senior seasons, was an experience that I would not trade for winning a valley championship in high school. I am sorry for what I put you through and I thank you for not allowing me to quit and making me into the man that I am today.
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